4 + 5 of 7

I gave myself the day off yesterday. It was an early Christmas present. I've not been being too strict on myself. That's a present too. Too many presents. They're pasts now. I'd not intended to do that but the season was getting on top of me. Rather than rest in it we tend to get put under by it. At least that's what happens with certain people I know. The pressure to make something the best ever. There's nothing wrong with making it just something not bad. What do you reckon Paul McCartney means by making a sad song better? Remember that scene in Midnight Cowboy when Joe Buck gets all spruced up and he ask Ratso what he thinks, the response being 'not bad.. not bad'. That is what I think human beings should aspire to. That is the only response needed. When you reach the gates and ask Peter if you have led a good life and he responds 'not bad, not bad'. Wouldn't that be a bit of a relief. Anyhow, there is time for that yet. Human beings neither live in the opresent or the past or the future. Scrooge could tell you that. Dunno where we exist but not there. I bought my mother a soft toy this year. It is a donkey. It cost 79p, I'm not cheap but I do hate money. I got off the bus earlier than I expected to when I saw it in the shop window, I was already thinking of what I was going to do when I got home before it pulled me back into the present. It'll be a good present for her when she gets it in the near future.

Snow by David Berman